Doing right in the face of oppression

For a while now I have loved reading dystopian novels. Mainly because it deals with a brave individual who fights for what is right despite opposition and oppression. The Hunger Games, Matched Series, The Uglies series, etc. I love the story of those who realize that their world isn't all that they want it to be and fight for a change. I love even more the Uglies series in which all the main character wants to do is fit in and yet is constantly challenged with the fact that "fitting in" would result in giving up an integral part of herself.

This Christmas I finally saw Lincoln. There were two things that hit me very hard in this movie that I hope I remember forever 1) war is personal. Maybe if we still fought hand to hand, had to see every face inches from your own when we killed, we would not be so eager to jump into the fray. I am sure those who have been in combat can attest to the horrors but that is another topic for another post. The second thing I realized was 2) Lincoln had a very very hard job to do and sometimes we forget that to some this was not seen an obvious wrong that needed to be righted. Half of the country was opposed, some of them within Lincoln's own party.

We live with the fact that the Northern States won over the Southern Confederation every day. You might not know it but each morning we wake up, 50 states undivided, and continue with our lives. Growing up I had an interracial couple for my backdoor neighbors. We played with their kids, got pushed on the swings by their grandfather affectionately known as Grandpa Joe to the neighborhood kids, and really none of this seemed out of place. How can you think that something is unique if it is the only thing that you have ever known. I didn't realize then and I am just realizing now the enormity of what has been accomplished.

I only have the movie to go on (which probably had some dramatizing involved so I apologize for any inaccuracies) but Lincoln pushed through the 13th Amendment with the threat (yes threat) of peace over his head. Lincoln used the civil war as leverage to push that in the eyes of the law ALL men are created equal. Now we won't get into Jim Crow laws or the following struggle to have this amendment reflected in society (and the racism that is still evident in parts of our country) but this is amazing. The first time the constitution mentions slavery is to reflect that it was illegal.

In the books I read there are obvious sides. In life this is not the case. President Lincoln was a leader of a great Nation and he was fighting even those within his own party to right the wrong. The main characters in the book only have to fight those that would oppress them. Lincoln, by what I saw in the movie, could have made peace ended the war, demanded surrender terms, and maintained his good standing with those who trusted him to act in their stead. Instead he fought for those that had no voice. He pushed off ending the war, killing many more men, to ensure that we could move forward as a Nation that would not have slavery.

With hindsight there are clear sides to this issue but those same people who stood on either side of this issue also stood next to their oppositions on other issues. This has always been the case and will continue to be the case in the future. Issues do not stand alone in a vacuum. I wish they did. But I have come to realize that nothing will be as clear cut as it is in the books. Changing one thing changes the whole. This is hardly addressed in these books because the clean up after the change is almost as hard as the change itself. America can attest to that.

 Looking back I can applaud Lincoln for what he did, how could I not? But what if my son, brother, father, or husband died in that last battle while he pushed off peace? What if I lost my home, living, family, or life in the pursuit of it? Would I applaud? I don't know. I would like to think that I would have said it was worth it. That the price I and others had to pay was worth what was gained. What if I fought for the other side? What if I thought that the southern economy would not survive? If I had to pay such a great price and still at the end of the war, lose the world that I had known, would I have applauded even if I opposed slavery?

I can't answer these questions. I have never been challenged in such a way. Maybe I read those books to be more like the heroes and heroines. So that if the time comes when I need to pay the price I can look back and say it was worth it.

The Baker family Christmas Letter

Every year that I can remember (except for the first two years my parents moved down to Winston-Salem) my dad has, with great joy, patience, and a lot of frustration about margins and page lengths, issued the annual Baker Christmas letter.

I don't know when the tradition started or when it turned into a list of funny happenings from our family but it became a "thing". Frequently at church one of my friends would run up and tell me that they had gotten the Christmas letter. This was, unfortunately, followed up by a recitation of one of my embarrassing moments of the year. Luckily, my dad has always been sensitive to what is being sent out in the letter so he always let us read, and remove, any stories that we deemed "too embarrassing".

The most frustrating part of the Christmas letter is getting a call, text AND email from my dad on December 20th asking me "What are some stories from the past year?" My faulty memory, never stellar to begin with, blanks at the demand for a memory. If someone says quick what is your favorite memory about X all I end up thinking is "Craaaapppp why don't I have any memories about that?!". The pressure is suddenly on not only to remember funny things that have happened to you, your siblings, parents or extended family, but they also have to be funny and witty enough to warrant an inch or two of sacred letter space.

Our present last year which was a 

print out of all the letters since 1993

The second most frustrating and yet fondly remembered time is the actual mailing of the letter. In the past we would include with the letter: 1) matching cards - hand signed by each of us and 2) a picture of us from Walmart (the portrait kind where we are wearing matching sweaters) or a copy of a picture of us with Santa (disregarding the fact that you are 16 and, lets face, waaayyy to cool for all your friends to know that your mom still makes you sit on santa's lap). We would have a production line of all the kids plus parents, folding the printed out letter, putting it into the card with the picture, stuffing an envelope, licking the envelope closed, and addressing and stamping the envelope (luckily with printed off labels, return addresses, and self stick stamps). Fortunately we have cut it down to just the letter and card signed by one of us on behalf of the family.

This year's letter has been just as I always remembered. Dad working to get stories and then cut those down to bare wittiness so that to make the one page (front and back) requirement. Katie editing the story, Kristen reluctantly accepting that she is the focus of one of the stories, and John being completely chill about the arrangement. O yes, and mom worried about a) when we will stuff the letters b) if we have enough stamps and c) when we will get to mail them (NO POST ON SUNDAYS!).

As a break to writing this post I attempted to assist my dad in making the two page requirement (two sentences too many) and, after three seconds of scrolling, was rudely shooed away to go finish whatever I was doing on the other side of the table.

Dad hard at work after the shooing me away to focus on those

two stubborn lines that refused to make the page the right length

Regardless of the fact that the letter is some what of a pain, I can freely admit that it wouldn't be christmas without it. Christmas would be just a little bit less sentimental without the craziness of the letter. In fact, last year we received a book of all the letters we have sent out and it was a great way to remember all the memories I often forget about. Also, I would hate to disappoint those avid fans of my dad's yearly reflective prose. 

Now I must go. My dad is whimpering and calling for me to assist him with holding the letter up to the light.... don't ask.

Merry Christmas!!!